- Doesn’t leave you feeling dry or rob you of your dignity.
- Like wearing an armor of man-scent
- Drop-kicks dirt, then slams odor with a folding chair.
- Manly scent forces your body to smell great, even when it doesn’t want to.
- Refreshing lather drop-kicks dirt and odor, does a clothesline on them and then slams them with a folding chair.
- Hydrating formula leaves your skin smooth, not tight or dry or on the curb, crying into the rain.
Product Description
Scrub three levels of shame away. There are three known levels of dirt and odor. There’s thermosphere odor, which can be detected by those in close proximity to you, such as subway riders or your fellow tank commander. Next is stratospheric odor that only you can smell. Finally, microscopic beings that live on your body emit dirt and odor before laying their horrible eggs into your skin and spawning an unholy ecosystem. High endurance body wash helps get rid of all this.
From the Manufacturer
Scrub three levels of shame away. There are three known levels of dirt and odor. There’s thermospheric odor, which can be detected by those in close proximity to you, such as subway riders or your fellow tank commander. Next is stratospheric odor that only you can smell. Finally, microscopic beings that live on your body emit dirt and odor before laying their horrible eggs into your skin and spawning an unholy ecosystem. Old Spice High Endurance Body Wash helps get rid of all this.
At a Glance
- Cleansing rinse cleans you, makes you feel refreshed
- Washes many smells away
- Lather chokeslams dirt and odor away
For a True Olfactory Experience, Try Them Together
Many manly ways to enjoy odor protection all day long and beyond.
Aerosol Anti-Perspirant & Deodorant
Wetness protection you can count on
Long-Lasting Stick Anti-Perspirant & Deodorant
Long-lasting. Stick.
Bar Soap
Devastates odor
Body Wash
Drop-kicks dirt and odor
Clear Gel
Long lasting but clear
Long-Lasting Stick Deodorant
A scent with staying power
Body Spray
Turn up your man-smell
Frequently Asked Questions
Manly Scents to Choose From
What are the pros of procuring this product?
- It plants a flag of fragrance high atop your man mountain
- It gives heart to the weak, while striking fear into your enemies
- It smells like cobra fangs
- It allows you to mark large geographical areas with your scent and increase your dominion
- It increases your ability to sense other dimensions
- It makes you feel like a delicious meatball sandwich for women
- It makes larger mammals fear you
- It allows you to save small animals using only your man scent
What are the cons of procuring this product?
- It incites an unmistakable urge to wrestle large animals
- It creates a desire to climb tall mountains simply because they exist
- It smells too manly
- Its manly scent causes people to assume you’re an astronaut able to answer aerospace queries
What if my current soap isn’t manly enough?
Try Old Spice Body Wash.
What if I smell like a turtle cage?
Try Old Spice Deodorant.
What if I want to slap the smell of America on my face?
Try an Old Spice fragrance in Aftershave or Cologne.
What if my armpits spring a leak?
Try Old Spice Anti-Perspirant.
What if I’ve lost my man-smell?
Try Old Spice Body Spray.
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